Today I made a mistake. It hurt someone's feelings, I am fairly sure. I was devastated and ashamed and once I had realized i had done it, I was sent into a spiral of emotions, dark ones. However, it led me to some insights.
1. Wanting to be forgiven seems more about me than about helping the person I wronged. I wanted to say I was sorry and for the person to make it alright. I wanted to know I was safe and not disliked. This is all about me and not about the other person.
2. There is very little you can do to actually make the person feel better sometimes. After you say you are sorry, you might make a vow never to make the mistake again, but really nothing takes away what you did. The person is hurt and the damage done. Most likely you aren't trusted anymore (unless you had a lot of trust to begin with when you did this, but in my case this is most likely not true)... and all you can hope is that the person has some good things coming to them from someone else that might salvage their day.
3. I wonder what the bible says about this? What do Buddhist teachings say about this? Anyone know any good resources about forgiving yourself?